A different kind of love

So we had just finished giving Trey a bath on Saturday night, and Brandon says, "He's gotta be a pain at some point, right?" I won't be naive enough to pretend the answer to that question is no, but that really got me thinking of how very much I love my child.

I love him so much, that things I never would have thought would be entertaining before, are now the most fun in the world. Watching Elmo's world, walking from room to room in the house, turning a light on and off, collecting rocks and tearing up leaves outside - these things are absolutely fabulous, because I am doing them with Trey. And he likes them. And at the end of every day, when I am absolutely exhausted, it is the best exhausted I have ever felt. I have spent a great deal of my day working to help provide for Trey's physical needs, and the rest of the day I have been playing with him, helping him to learn and develop.

Of course we have our moments. Discipline has begun, and it's not going very well for me. Trey's big thing now is throwing food. What am I supposed to do when Trey is throwing his food, I give him a stern look and say no, he looks me right in the eye, picks up a piece of food, and throws it at my head??? Part of me is so frustrated that Trey won't listen to me, and also that he even needs to be disciplined in the first place. (Wasn't my child perfect not so long ago?) Then part of me is struggling desperately not to laugh, both because the situation and look on his face are pretty funny, but also because there is some very strange joy in seeing him grow and learn enough to express himself.

And this is just small potatoes for parental frustration. Trey is beginning to climb. The terrible twos are just around the corner. Potty training. School, where I am told that because he is a boy, he will get into fights and call people names, etc. Plus the gigantic elephant in the room that I really don't want to talk about - that Lord willing, one day my precious little boy will be a...teenager. And God help us. Or maybe just help me, Brandon's great with teenagers. Me - not so much.

But despite all this, I love Trey more than I ever thought I could love a creature. With a different kind of love. And what an incredible picture God has given us, that as parents we can get a taste of the love He has for us.

I'm not one to talk about my faith much. I've only led one person to Christ in my lifetime, and that's pretty sad. It needs to be my banner, something that identifies me. Maybe I live differently and can use that as my witness, but people still need to know why I live the way I do.

Who knows how many people read this blog. We estimate a very small handful. Regardless, I am compelled to say to anyone reading this that God loves you immensely. Wherever you are, no matter what you have done, if you've spent your entire life running from or avoiding Him, or if, like me, you tug on your very short leash all day, every day, before running back to Him. He loves you and finds so much joy in you. Anticipates spending time with you, enjoys watching you grow, especially closer to Him.

It is a special lesson that parents are priveleged to live out every day. We would do anything, walk through fire, even die for our children. The way that God would do anything for us. Did everything for us. Sent His only son to die on that cross in our place, so that we could have a relationship with Him and spend eternity with Him in heaven. God loves you.