blessed beyond measure

This is for my boys. Not for right now, so Trey and Aden, if you are reading this and you're still shorter than I am, please skip it and save it for another time. Please. But please, do come back and read it when you're older. This gut-wrenching post has taken me weeks to write after months of it swirling around in my head. It will be too long, too personal, and not nearly as positive as I like to keep the blog content. (Dear few readers, if you're not up for a marathon or some sad recaps, there will be lighter posts to come soon.) Somewhere over the last eight years, this blog became how I remember everything. It's a wonderful thing, an active and ongoing scrapbook of you boys' lives, the place where I try hard to record our favorite memories, important milestones, and life moments that shouldn't be allowed to slip away. And while I hope and pray that you will remember the good, it seems you should also know that not everything was good all the ti...

As always, December has filled itself up with plenty of holiday merriment. A family scouting trip, where Trey got some good experience at making shot charts. A trip with Giga and Poppop to various stops around the lake to see train collections. This was fascinating, especially the ones that Aden got to operate himself. For our church program, Aden was slated to be a shepherd, though sickness prevented him from being in the live show. This is him at rehearsal: And here is Trey operating the sound board. He's learning so much from his Daddy. On Aden's last day of school for the year, his class put on a singalong program. Aden also played a special part by holding a giant (fake) ax and pretending to chop down a Christmas tree. Wish the phone had held out for video of this. He's standing behind one of the kids holding a tree picture, waiting to chop her down. And then Christmas at home. Thanks to the generosity of some very dear friends, we were able to gi...

Love incarnate, love divine Star and angels gave the sign Bow to babe on bended knee The Savior of humanity Unto us a child is born He shall reign forevermore Noel, Noel Come and see what God has done Noel, Noel The story of amazing love The light of the world Given for us Noel Son of God and Son of Man There before the world began Born to suffer, born to save Born to raise us from the grave Christ the everlasting Lord He shall reign forevermore Noel, Noel Come and see what God has done Noel, Noel The story of amazing love The light of the world Given for us Noel We wish you a blessed holiday season filled with the peace, hope and joy of our Savior, Jesus Christ Merry Christmas

The nerves and anticipation ran high on Saturday morning as we prepared for the first of what will likely end up being hundreds of basketball games for Aden. He really, truly was nervous, our little Taz. But he had good reason to be. A gaggle of too-vocal family members in the stands. A team counting on him to basically be their leader. And then the other team, pawing like angry cats trying to get the ball away. That's a lot on a five-year-old. But he handled it with grace. And played fantastically. Played pretty good defense, ran the point like a boss, and got an assist for five out of the six buckets his team scored. The only hiccup came when, toward the end of a melee of an offensive possession, Aden was wide open under the basket. A teammate passed him the ball and the aforementioned gaggle shouted in unison from the bleachers, "SHOOT!" Aden handed the ball to his coach and told her quietly, "I don't want to shoot today." He seemed to be ...

The holiday and winter seasons for us just wouldn't be the same without basketball. We are a basketball family. The boys love it. Trey probably a little more than Aden at this point, as Trey is either playing ball in the kitchen or watching it on TV with any free moments he has. But he still refuses to play on a team. Which (excuse me for whatever motherly bias is in this statement) is a huge loss for the institution of basketball. Kid. Got. Skillz. And anxiety issues. So he won't play. To our extreme frustration. Aden, while not as devoted to the game as Trey, has chosen to play on a team and has quite the talent himself. Blue eyes was practically born dribbling a ball, and after only a few weeks of practice with his team, has been made point guard. First game ever on Saturday. We are pumped . Then Brandon, besides being obsessed with the sport in general, coaches the boys' varsity team at the school where he teaches. The boys and me, my folks, and Brand...

Last night, Brandon and I had the rare privilege of attending a fabulous rock and roll festival. That was its actual name, "Fabulous Rock and Roll Festival". Our sweet little men for about an hour set aside their relentless fighting and chose to work together, to put on a performance for the ages. They set the scene carefully. Their stage, the 3-foot-square landing almost at the bottom of our basement steps. Their sound system, a kid CD player and Paw Patrol microphone. Premier audience seats provided by two perfectly placed gigantic floor pillows. There we sat and took in the magical and quite humorous talents of Trey and Aden. Two songs each, and while one brother was singing, the other would pop out from behind the stair wall at select moments of the song, and dance. There were some odd moments, like when Aden came into the audience, picked up a fake carrot from the toy grill and threw it on the stage at Trey. Or when Aden sat down with the audience, grabbed a me...

I try to fit You in the walls inside my mind. I try to keep You safely in between the lines. I try to put You in the box that I've designed. I try to pull You down so we are eye to eye. When did I forget that You've always been the King of the world? I try to take life back right out of the hands of the King of the world. How could I make You so small when You're the one who holds it all? When did I forget that You've always been the King of the world? Just a whisper of Your voice can tame the seas. So who am I to try to take the lead? Still I run ahead and think I'm strong enough when You're the one who made me from the dust. When did I forget that You've always been the King of the world? I try to take life back right out of the hands of the King of the world. How could I make You so small when You're the one who holds it all? When did I forget that You've always been the King of the world? You set it all in motion, every si...

Wanted to share this, from my journey through the Bible this year chasing the word stop . This was one detour I took after getting to John 20:27, "Stop doubting and believe." Words said by Jesus to Thomas, who in his very much humanness needed to see this completely unbelievable thing that had happened. And in my very much humanness, as I long with every fiber of my being to see Jesus, He says these words to me when I need them the most. I took a side road and hunted down the word believe in the Scriptures. And found promises innumerable. Precious promises. Here are some results of belief I found. Not just believing in God, but really, truly, actively, sold-out believing God . Not the celestial police officer ready to toss down lightning bolts at all who stray. Not the apathetic grandfather in the sky who has lost control. Not, for the love of all things holy, a political placeholder. Not the genie who fits into our small boxes of understanding. But the One and...

This past summer, our Sunday school class, which started with about five people ten years ago and has since, through visitors and marriage and babies, grown to over seventy, held a party on church grounds. The guys set up a massive slip and slide for the kids. Trey, usually a wallflower, jumped right in and really enjoyed himself. Aden had a blast too. Ham. Then came Pastor Clif, being all things to all people. Enjoying the first football game of the season from Daddy's VIP spot on the track. Daddy's a very big fish in a pretty small pond, and buddy, we reap the benefits! Top-of-the-ferris-wheel selfie at the county fair. I refuse to have anything to do with selfie stick ridiculousness, so of course you can't tell we are at the top of the ferris wheel. But we are. New rule of grandparenting: on your birthday, buy your grandkids a present. And so Poppop did. And so we had target practice in the house late one night using clear plastic cups as targets. ...